I’ve been on my prescribed anti-depressants for about three weeks.  I can’t particularly identify if I’m “feeling” any different.  The fact that I am expecting something to happen has me on edge, waiting, for that moment to occur.  I keep imagining that one day I’ll be walking or driving and then, like magic, something will switch and I’ll be the Cheney I know.  I have noticed that I’ve been more aware and paying attention, to my surroundings; taking in those things around me.  Most of the time I get lost in my thoughts because I still haven’t figured out how to slow my mind down, which is usually going a mile a minutes (and that’s pretty fast).  Often times, I snap back into the reality, when there’s this awful breath breathing in my face or the gross feeling of a tongue sneaking licks on my hands or toes.  It’s Maxx!

Before I discovered what was wrong with me, I think Maxx already knew.  When I was going through some really bad days, Maxx was really getting on my nerves!  Everywhere I turned there he was, everywhere I walked he was on my heels. Each time I wanted to stretch my legs, as I sat on the couch, I couldn’t because he had positioned himself directly under my bent leg.  Each time I took I shower, I’d open the shower curtain to step out of the tub and he would be laying on the bath math.  I just couldn’t get him to leave me alone.  I’d yell at him and buy him toys and treats to keep him busy, but nothing worked.  Maxx is a very loving dog and has his moments of wanting to be under me, but this time was different. Continue reading →